
With heaving breaths, on my knees and hacking, I arrive back to consciousness. I can her the sound of her giggling above me as my eyes return to focus. Her high heeled leather boots are just below my nose as she pushes my face down to them.
“Kiss my feet, bitch. Wash my feet with your tears.” She grabs me with a vicious earpull and pulls my head up and I look at her amazing abs with their flaunting power.
“Look into my eyes,” she commands.
“Please, no. I can’t.”
She yanks my head back and puts her face close to mine. She stares into my eyes and I am helpless. Energy swirls around my tailbone and shoots up my spine, flooding each of my chakras. My body shakes violently from the energy, and she laughs. “That’s a good boy.”
Shoving me down, she straddles me, undulating over my kidneys, then flips me over, holding my gaze with her stare. My heart beats wildly and I feel like I’m choking. She rubs my forehead, overcharging all the chakras.

She lifts me into a bearhug and shakes me violently. My legs and feet dangling over her lean, muscular thighs and calves. She throws me down and circles me while I try to steady my shaking body. She pulls my head to her magnificent rippling abs and I rub my lips against them. I stick my tongue into her belly button and she slaps me hard.
As I lay on my back looking up at her beautiful grinning face my body is so light it feels like I am levitating as my chakra energy fields spin wildly. I can feel the energy from my palms against the floor. I look up at her magnificent ass and she allows me to grip her soft muscular calves as she squats over me, bringing her luscious ass to my greedy lips. Each time she lifts her ass away from me I feel I could will my body to float up to her so I can kiss it again.
She ties a rope around my scrotum and then ties the other end of the rope to the door knob, and then stands just out of reach of my lips as I strain to stretch my scrotum just two inches more so I can kiss her ass. With deep breaths centered on my navel I concentrate. Each heartbeat is a like a stone cast into a lake of pain, its rippling energy sending vibrations through the ends of my toes and fingertips as my body is like a high voltage generator of power ready for her consumption. My soul is begging for her to save it from its agony of desire.
Finally, she relents and backs into my face and pulls my nose and tongue into her voluptuous folds as I give her muscular thighs a strong massaging. I briskly rub into her superbly striated thighs, into the crevices of her muscles, between muscle and joint; and roughly rub her knees as she undulates to the rhythm of my tongue.
Suddenly, she spins around and grabs me with a vicious earpull with one hand while she holds up a whip in the other.
“I need to see how ready you are,” she says as she whips my cheek with quick vicious whips.
The stinging makes me focus all my energy in my lower navel as my entire body goes limp in her hand. I am afraid to look at her because I will lose my focus through the desire at looking at her beautiful face. But she holds the whip to my cheek and begins licking my lips with a wry smile.

She then bends me over a table and begins spanking my bare ass and spitting into my ass crack, rubbing and massaging and telling me how nice it looks to her. She remarks that the lunges are working out for me and ordered me to do a hundred more a day. I cringe as she jams the spike of her leather boot into the top of my foot and laughs. But the pain doesn’t last long, in my foot at least, as she sticks her leathered fingers into my ass and begins to twirl them around. I start huffing and bucking and she commands me to hold still, shoving me back down and bracing her powerful thighs between my legs and pinning against the table. She holds my head down against the table as she probes my ass with her gelled leather gloved hand. My squeals just make her laugh harder.
“Be grateful you make me laugh, you silly son of a bitch,” she says and continues to probe and rub with her fingers, making me involuntarily buck and wiggle.
“Oh, you are going to be fun,” she says.
She pulls me up and wraps her arm under my throat while she uses her other arm to crank my head, leading me to the floor on my knees. She then ties my hands to my feet and makes me stare into her eyes as she makes me suck her long high heel. The sight of her with her beautiful long black hair and olive skin in that red and black mini tank top, and her rippling stomach muscles is more than I can take. My eyes start to water as I try to concentrate all my energy into my hands in order to dispel the deep throbbing vibrations that threaten to consume me from within.
She motions with her head towards the bed and asks me if I want to go over there, and the energy is pulsing so hard in my body that my throat stops up and cannot speak. I just nod vigorously, the tears streaming down my face.
“Okay, then,” she says, and I hurry over.

“On your back.”
I get on my back and she sits on my face while she slaps my cock, taunting me that it doesn’t suit her accept to have fun with. Each time she slaps my balls my face pushes hard into her ass and pussy. Each time she slaps I don’t think I can take any more pain, but she slaps again, sending me further into reaches of ecstasy than I had known before. And it makes me dig my lips and tongue into her pussy and my nose into her ass, making her body shiver with delight.
I don’t want to beg her to stop because it will make her angry, so I keep hoping each slap will be the last. Finally, she grabs my head and cranks it, leading me over onto my stomach and tells me not to look up. She is strapping on her dildo and oiling it up. I can hear the straps as she cinches them up.
“Do you have enough power for me? If you don’t you can go home right now.”
“No, mistress. I have lots of power for you. Please take it. I only exist to make power for you. I just want to please you.”
“You are not to give power to anyone else. Do you understand?”
“Yes, mistress. Only you mistress. You are so beautiful. I just want to…”
“That’s enough. I only let you serve me because you are strong enough. I don’t allow any weaklings in here. Do you understand me?”
“Yes, mistress. Sorry, mistress.”
“Shut the fuck up and arch your back.”

She teases and rubs her dildo around my rim and with short jutting movements jabs it in and out, readying me for a big thrust. When it comes a scream explodes from my lips.
“Don’t be a pussy,” she shouts. “Take it like a man.”
She gives me a moment to relax and with each breath I relax my sphincter for her and she pushes it in a little deeper. When it is in all the way she leans on me and begins bouncing us up and down on the bed while she holds my head down with all of her weight. Her hips gyrate and buck wildly, torturing me into a frenzy as she shouts.
“Whose bitch are you?”
“Yours!”
“Whose?”
“Yoh oh oh oh orsss!!! Ah hah hah hah hoh hun hun hun. Aieee aiee aiee. Only yoh hoh hoh ors!!! Aieee ee ee ee.”
She laughs and thrust hard and all of my energy is concentrated on my face, leaving me a limp rag for her to pummel.
“Oh god yes” she says. “Oh, oh oh. I’m going to fuck you until I drain every ounce of energy from you. Do you understand me? You are mine. I own you.”
No sounds come from my mouth anymore. The screams of torture are simply written on my face as she puts her elbow into the back of my neck, burying the dildo as deep as it will go and bouncing up and down. The bed bounces back, a cohort in torture, impaling me with each thrust and return thrust of her dildo. When she slows down she is spent. She grabs my jaw and pulls my face toward her and her face is glowing. My energy is pulsing through her. It’s as if I don’t possess my own body as it lies there limp. I can see her energy body glowing with the energy it has taken from me. I look into her gorgeous face as she offers it to my lips. Gratefully, I cover it with moth kisses.

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This guy feels stupid because Mistress wants him to bark like a dog. He laughs in embarrassment. It’s a joke. He paid money and wants to be amused. As though Mistress is some commodity to act out his desires. She berates him for being quiet, but he just lay there with a stupid self absorbed smirk. Self conscious that he is on camera, the idiot doesn’t realize that he is the commodity. People watching just want to see him used. They could care less about him.
 
Mistress orders him on the table and shocks his balls, but he is like a cadaver, a limp fish. Is there life in him?
Mistress gets out of her nurses’ uniform and straps on her big black dildo. She is gut wrenching gorgeous in her red panties. The moron drops to his and eagerly swallows the dildo and Mistress has to teach him how to properly suck it.
 
Mistress has had enough of this stupid, lifeless, self absorbed idiot. He wants an ass reaming? He’s got it. She has no mercy as she ridicules him and pounds him relentlessly. The look on his face is priceless. Gone is the self-absorbed, self conscious humiliation. He is the used. He is just a stupid fuck toy, and he has pissed her off.
 
Went to a party at Pinkie’s last night. There was gorgeous blonde there who kept staring at me. No matter who I was talking to I couldn’t help taking a glance at her because she was drop dead gorgeous, but I didn’t know what her deal was. There are so many sick fucking people in this world all chasing their own agenda. Like the song says, some want to use you and some want to be used by you. When a person who wants to use you realizes you want to be used by them it gives them an incredible amount of power over you. It puts you in a position where you are willing to compromise yourself in ways you would never imagine.
Anyway, I sit down and this chick comes over and sits in one of those swivel chairs. I don’t know what the fuck you call them. It doesn’t matter. Some things you just know without knowing the proper label to define. She sits there with a drink in her hand staring off into the recesses of her mind. Her gaze was out to the wall or something, but people were walking past her and she couldn’t see them. She started swiveling around in the chair in such a way that she kept kicking me in the shin with her spiked heel every time she spun around. I had a stupid moment and failed to realize she was trying to get my attention. Sometimes things are so fucking obvious you can’t believe they’re happening.
I was getting a little pissed off that she kept swinging around and kicking me, but I don’t speak harshly to gorgeous chicks unless they are being stupid. My friend Billie knew the chick and exchanged smirks each time the chick swung around and kicked me, and I finally realized what was up. I saw the blonde take the last sip from her glass and I immediately got up and asked her if I could get her another and she said no. She was going to go out for some fresh air. The answer deflated me and she saw my dejection and told me to join her.
So we went outside on the patio and she pulls a bag out of her purse and asks me if I can roll a joint and I said yes. She said that was good, it meant I was useful for something. I took the bag from her and told her that she might be able to find me useful for a lot of things.
“Anita told me you are an adequate cook, and that you know how to give a good massage.”
“Yes, Ma’am,” I said. My body started shaking. My shoulders and wrists started twitching which made rolling the joint difficult. She saw that, but didn’t say anything and I liked that. I already liked her because she seemed to have no use for stupid comments or small talk.
We smoked the joint and she led the conversation with a deliberate manner and sober observation. We shared a similar taste in hardcore metal music. She also liked electronic trance music. We both observed how you can explore emotions to a heightened degree while listening to trance. The weed was good shit and I was experiencing a similar state to what we were talking about. My focus was so clear. I was keenly aware of every smell in the air, the smoke from the neighbor’s chimney, the dog shit in back of the shed, the gas leak from a car, her perfume and the smell of her hair.
“Let’s go back to my place,” she said.
I am a bit of a commodity among her type of women so I am somewhat used to hearing this, but it still thrills me beyond desire to hear a gorgeous woman say this. I was weightless as I skipped to my car and got in and followed her. She lives on the east side of town, where the beautiful people live, the people that never accept invitations to others’ houses, but if you are important enough will have you over to show off.
Michelle was an executive at a bank and could only imagine how much control she held over the men. I pictured her lean muscular legs and long blond hair and pretty face having the same effect as an army drill sergeant spitting commands in your face. She didn’t bother with small talk about the house or anything else and I knew flattering remarks didn’t matter to her. I didn’t want to piss her off with them.
She led me straight to her basement dungeon and shut the door. She just stood there with her arms folded scrutinizing me. I have seen this look so many times I knew the drill, but I can still never get used to it. Every woman is different about how they want things done. So I learned to keep my mouth shut and just wait for instructions. Sometimes it pisses them off because they think I can’t figure things out, but I would rather them think I was malleable rather an idiot who made stupid errors of judgment. Luckily, Michelle didn’t think that. Finally, she must’ve made up her mind what she was going to do with me. She motioned with her head and said “there’s a changing room over their.”
When I came out she was waiting for me. That made me tremble to know she was so eager to get started. She immediately cuffed my hands, tied me up and pulled lifted me on her pulley. As I dangled in the air above her she gripped my throat, lightly choking me and dominating me with her eyes. She measured my pain threshold, increasing the viciousness of slaps by degrees.
Her magnificent skin sent indescribable chills up my spine as it came into contact with me. Her shoulder and elbow jutting into my skeleton as she lifted my leg and tied it to a post. She whipped my inner thigh and each time the whip hit my skin I wanted to scream but I choked it back. But I couldn’t stop the stream of tears from my eyes. She kept whipping me and berating me for being a pussy. She said I was soft.
She then untied my leg from the post and slipped behind me and began teasing me with her sexy arms, rubbing them on my face. The thrill of my lips on those magnificent arms made me lose all calculative thinking. All that existed was her magnificence and my desire, experienced beyond measure. She suddenly slipped her arm under my chin and was choking me and giggling. I hadn’t heard her laugh until then. It was a wicked self indulgent giggle. I would get almost to the point of blacking out and she would release her hold and reposition herself, bending and cranking my neck against her beautiful arm as she bulged and twitched her forearm and biceps. After bringing nearly to the point of passing out time and again she had enough and took her cane out.
She was so insanely gorgeous in her black panties and leather boots I wanted badly to wack off. But the crack of her cane on my ass, back and legs made me forget about that. All of my focus was needed inward. You cannot think about how much something is hurting in a situation such as this. If you think about yourself, that you wish it would stop, the pain becomes unbearable and it takes control of you. Other people will never understand this. There are those who are curious and when they go through it isn’t a situation that serves them, to amuse them, and they don’t like it, and they walk away hating themselves. The inner strength and calm one can learn from a mistress is more than any life coach or guru could ever teach. With each crack of the cane I used my breath and mind to gather strength in my dantien, and then lightly and quickly opened and closed my palms to siphon off some of the access energy that I was circling through my torso and limbs.
She put the cane down and slapped me all over, taunting me how soft I was. She pinched and twisted my nipples and I screamed and yelped. The tears gushed and my throat was like a machine that churned sobbing. Her fingers probed my sphincter and she slapped and clutched my ass cheeks with vicious pinches.
“Go on, sissy. Scream some more, pathetic pussy.”
I knew I better not, or there was more painful measures in store until I learned to let go of myself. She wrapped her arm under my chin again and slapped my face with a dildo until it felt like my face was bleeding. She then ordered me to open wide and stuck it in my mouth and I choked hard.
“Dumb fuck. You’re not eating. You can’t swallow it like food.”
It didn’t matter to know that. I just have never been able to suck dildo, no matter how hard I try. It has really angered some women and they seemed to take it out harder on my ass. She tried a couple more times to get me to relax my throat, but it’s just one of those inhibitions I can’t let go of. Finally, she gave up and slapped me repeatedly with it. It pissed her off and I was scared.
She pulled me up by the rope, tipped my head towards the floor, and, spreading my legs apart began sticking her gloved hand in and out of my rectum, all the while taunting me.
“You like that, slut? Little fucking whore. You better be able to take it since you can’t suck cock. Piece of shit.”
She was really pissed and she wasted no time strapping on her dildo, and with one motion pulled me toward her and rammed it in. I squealed and writhed.
“Shut the fuck up. I thought you said were useful. Goddamn it. I thought you were serious.”
“I am mistress. I can take it,” I managed to croak as she laid into me, viciously clutching my hips and pulling me toward her with each thrust. I retreated with my focus inward, directing the energy of each of her thrusts throughout my body, energizing it. On the outside I was limpid, but on the inside I was gathering enormous energy. Her moans of pleasure as she relentlessly pounded me were beyond words. It is a magnificent manifestation of female power. So few men get to actually share that with a woman because they are closed to it, and so few women actually share it with their men in a way that men will accept it.
She must’ve fucked me for 20 minutes, spending all of the energy her anger had given her. She fucked me in all kinds of positions after untying me. Flopping me over a table, pushing my face against the wall, on my knees while she shoved my face into the floor. She delighted in my screeches and moans as she rammed, jiggled, pumped, probed and jackhammered me. Finally, her emotions were balanced and she relented. She was satisfied with me. But she wasn’t done. She wanted to toy with me some more so she tied my hands behind me and forced my face to the floor. I felt a butt plug jammed into my rectum and she began hammering it in with wicked slaps. Laughing, she grabbed my dantien and rubbed my stomach to keep my sphincter loose. This chick really knew what she was doing. My ears felt about to explode each time she slapped that plug and it dug in deeper.
She finished by whipping me and making me crawl on my hands and knees in a circle with that butt plug all the way in my ass. I begged her to let me wack off while he rubbed my face and lips over her body and face. With her breath in my ear my ear a released a raging geyser which she made me lick off from her. I thanked her profusely for her kindness. Her many kind looks throughout the experience were gratifying beyond comprehension. I don’t know if shee will contact me again, but her pretty face and arms have been imprinted deep enough in my mind’s eye to stay for quite a while.
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This gorgeous and powerful TS Mistress asserts her authority, skullfucking her desirous slaves. She teaches them the true meaning of deep and hard as she grinds, vibrates and powerfucks them to frenzied pain and lust. Taunting them that her cock his bigger, she emasculates them. The harder she fucks them the more they scream…for more!
 
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The whimpering slave is beyond desire. His throat constricted, eyes watering, ears popping. Mistress is aroused at his obedience. He has been put to sleep before, squeezed between her powerful thighs. Her powerful, amazon arms, wrapped with sweet soft skin threaten to choke him. She grabs his nipples in her hard cruel grip and he howls, delighting her even more.
 
Mistress taunts him “come, on you can take more than that. Can’t you?”
He can only moan in delicious pain at each crack of her whip as she mercilessly asserts control.
 
Mistress’ wicked cuffs to the face with her leather gloved hands leaves pelts on his cheeks. He meekly surrenders his throat to her powerful grasp. It is hopeless to resist her assertive gaze, and his sphincter twitches wildly. Her powerful legs brush against his, further weakening his will and draining his lower chakras. The movement of her thighs is a silent order to empty himself of his energy and give control of his body to her. With eager pleasure he offers himself.
 
He proves the loss of his personal gratification as he is gratefully licks the ground where mistress has stood. ) Next, he offers his neck to her so he can feel her lips on his as she mouths the dildo down his throat.
He’s completely empty of thoughts, his chakras are spinning wildly, his body limp. He is totally given to her now. She whips him brutally, but he doesn’t whimper.
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The next slave isn’t so lucky. Mistress doesn’t like him. He has an ego. He is there for curiosity, amusement. Mistress knows he’s an act. She slaps him hard, beating down his chest until it’s raw and bleeding. Her jaw is set and he knows by the look on her face she means business. She commands him to stand still and jerks him and holds him with her mean grip and continues to brutally whip his chest.
 
Kneeling, he keeps his head down. He has realized his mistake of treating mistress like a prostitute. And she is giving him a lesson he will never forget. “Is that a little dick or a hard dick?” she scoffs.
“It’s a little dick, Ma’am,” he says.
She leans over her him behind and again grasps his nipples I her clawlike grip and commands him to get a raging hard on. Mistress instructs him to play with his pathetic little dick while she whips him and smokes a cigarette, putting the butt out on his ass he screams in pain.
 
Mistress has had enough of him and bends his sorry ass over and fucks him hard. He writhes in agony, but it only raises Mistress’ blood more as she barks “I’m going to fuck you as long and hard as I want to fuck you!” And she totally immerses herself in the full glory of her power, relentlessly reaming him. His pathetic squeals are music to her ears.
My friend invited me over to watch the game and smoke a couple joints. Since I was lonely I thought, sure, what the fuck. Maybe his hot wife will be home.
They had an open relationship, my friend and his wife. She was free to fuck anyone she wanted and he was free to watch. When he told me about this at work one day my whole body was energized, as if electric jolts were lifting me by the armpits. I immediately had an unrestrained desire to meet this woman who had so much control.
I found myself staring at the picture he had of her on his desk every chance I could. I emblazoned that image of her cruel smile in my mind and recalled it at all the way home, daily. I would hurry through dinner and rush to the bedroom with my lotion, fixating my mind on that beautiful cruel woman.
Every day my friend would tell me about his wife’s sexual conquests, and how he knelt at her feet while she embraced some poor sap who that he was getting an easy fuck. He would cook dinner for them, make the bed for them, be a footstool for his wife while her lover made love to her on the couch. He had grown used to sleeping on the floor next to the bed, and massaging Anita’s feet after she fucked her lover. And if he dared look at her without permission he would not be able to lick her pussy after she had finished.
In the morning, if she hadn’t banished her lover of the previous night, Matt would make breakfast as Anita ordered and then kneel at feet under the table, licking her toes as she and her lover talked and ate.
I was astonished that Matt said this relationship was liberating. That because of it he was no longer enslaved to the ideology of manhood and was free to experience his desire to the fullest. He felt an intense gratitude towards Anita, and he said he would do anything for her. Oddly enough, he said it also proved Anita loved him more than anyone else he’d ever known because she made no appeals to his ego, no demands that he conform. Hers was an unselfish love that no other woman had ever shown him.
When I got to Matt’s house I was not disappointed. I knocked on the door and heard Anita’s voice for the first time. “Come in.”
I slowly turned the knob so as to maintain decorum of respect and entered with my head bowed. I took a short glance over to the kitchen and saw Anita in a shimmering light blue nightgown, her beautiful long blond hair tied in back. Her sexy strong feminine arm rested on the table while she ate a bowl of cereal. Under the table Matt silently lay in a fetal position sucking on her toes.
“Say hello,” she commanded.
“Hello,” I said.
She gave me a severe look. “Not you.”
At the same time Matt said “how’s it goin’ man” I said “yes, ma’am.”
Anita stared me down. I could not bear to look at her. “You need to learn to speak when you are spoken to.”
I was too afraid to answer. I could only look down with an apologetic look of reverence.
“Look at me,” she commanded. And I gladly obliged.
“Matt tells me you are a good cook.”
The thought that news of my pathetic, insignificant existence had reached her ears sent chills to my scrotum. But I was afraid to acknowledge my cooking skills lest she be disappointed.
“I try,” I said with a weak voice and looking down at my feet.
“I certainly don’t let Matt stay around because of his ability to cook,” she said. “Make me an omelet. For once I would like a real breakfast.”
She saw my hesitation, but didn’t seek to reassure me. “Get going. The pans are next to the stove. You should be able to find everything you need. My kitchen’s no different than any other kitchen. There are no secret hiding places for eggs, vegetables, condiments or knives.”
I couldn’t resist a quick glance at her gorgeous face. But when I glanced to that lovely strong arm my gaze was suspended, and she saw it. And she saw my body start to tremble. “I’m sorry, ma’am,” I quickly apologized. She studied me for an excruciating couple of seconds while my soul squirmed and my restless chakras stirred. Then she dismissed me with a wave her hand and I, grateful I hadn’t incurred her wrath, quickly skipped into the kitchen.
I managed a quick look over at Matt while I got a pan out, but he was intent on sucking on Anita’s toes while she silently read the paper.
“Get me a cup of coffee,” she said.
I looked down at Matt, but he wasn’t going anywhere.
“Matt’s busy. I’m talking to you.”
I looked over at the pan heating on the stove and then over at her.
“You can do two things at once, can’t you?” she said sarcastically.
“Yes, ma’am,” I said, and quickly took the coffee decanter over to her, my hand shaking as I tried to fill her cup.
“If you spill any I am going to be really pissed off,” she said cuttingly.
With all of the control my mind could muster I managed to empty the remains of the decanter into her cup without spilling a drop.
“Now don’t forget the omelet,” she said.
I quickly got back to work on her food, cutting up some green onions, peppers and potato.
“And don’t call me ma’am again,” she barked. But she didn’t say how I should address her.
“I have spoken to you,” she barked.
“Yes mistress,” I said.
Her silence told me she was happy with that. I served her the food and set to doing the dishes without being told. She had not said whether she liked the meal or not, but she ate everything. So I was pleased. When she had done she said, “okay, you boys enjoy the game.” And she got up and went to the bedroom and closed the door.
Matt, crawled out from under the table and said “nice job, man. She likes you. Good thing you can cook.” And then I realized that Matt had singled me out for a purpose. It was cool, though. I liked Matt and we had some things in common. Not the least of which was an appreciation for good smoke.
Matt motioned for me to follow him downstairs and he rolled a joint, put the game on the tv and put on the latest Lamb of God CD.
After a while Anita came downstairs and I immediately got up and bowed my head. Matt sat up and winked at me. Anita gave him a kiss and a hug and asked him if he wanted anything special from the store and he rattled off a couple items. Anita then turned to me with a warm smile and handed me a small photo album and said. “I want you to use these, and follow the instructions written on the inside front cover.”
I started to open the photo album and caught the quickest glimpse of Anita’s rippling abs when she scolded me. “Wait until you get home.”
I quickly shut the album and thanked her, and she could feel the energy waves from my heart, eyes and forehead.
“So, you like the new CD,” Matt asked after Anita had left, signaling we weren’t going to discuss her.
After the game I hurried home to masturbate while looking at the picture of her in the photo album, and following the instructions she had written, just at the time I was about to spew I concentrated on one of my chakras.
My mind had been captured by Anita and now her image, her voice, her words dominated my thoughts. I found myself hurrying home from work every day to eat, and then to masturbate while concentrating on the pictures Anita had given me. And then at bedtime I would repeat. Every Sunday hurried to Anita’s kitchen to prepare breakfast for her and chill out with Matt afterwards while she went out.
And I realized my mind was slowly being reprogrammed. It no longer made my heart beat furiously when some clerk was snotty, or someone at work made their stupid, judgmental remarks. My mind was losing that animal protective instinct. I felt a growing personal integrity that was too strong to be pulled into the fool’s game of confrontation. Everyone died countless times through the drama and the fiction their minds created and which their brains carried out. Ridicule and praise was nothing more than an audience’s reaction to the role they have assigned to you in their particular drama. I no longer cared enough to respond to caustic remarks or undignified treatment at the hands of others. The more furious others became the more calm I got. Anita made me strong. No one could ever crush my ego like Anita, and somehow knowing that reduced the threat of everyone else.
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